Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Time for a Change

Change.  Some would say it's inevitable, even necessary.  I have changed immensely over the past year.  Is the change good or bad?  I guess that depends on your perspective.

I have learned from Louise Hay, author of "You Can Heal Your Life", that most of our feelings come from either love or fear.  The following link explains it much better than I can.  I've put it in the middle of the blog because I think it will help to understand what follows.
Let go of your fears - Louise Hay

I was born into a house of fear.  Not extreme fear, like there was going to be some sort of major world calamity, but a general distrust of everything and everyone.  People are no good, everyone is out to take advantage of you, nothing ever goes my way, keep your doors locked, have a gun ready just in case.

When my brother wanted to start his own business, we thought we were giving him helpful advice.  We made sure we pointed out everything that could possibly go wrong.  Did we really help him?  Or would it have been better to have been supportive, and talk about all the things that could go right?  We were operating from a place of fear.  Fear of the unknown.  Fear of the "what-if's".

Over the last year, I have transitioned from operating from a place of fear to operating out of love.  No longer am I the "glass half empty" kind of person.  I try to see the best in everyone, or at least understand why someone is behaving in an inappropriate way.  I know that if I think negatively, I am likely to receive negativity in return.  If I expect the best, I normally get it.  It has given me a completely new outlook on life, and I am happier than I have been in a long time.  A year ago 90% of what I worried about never happened anyway.  Today I don't waste my time thinking about the "what-if's and if-only's".

In my mind, these changes are all for the best.  I feel like the chrysalis stage of a butterfly, metamorphosing from a caterpillar and evolving into the true beauty that I know I possess.  But that's because I am no longer coming from a place of fear.  Some of my family members are still motivated by fear, and to them the changes I've made seem threatening or downright crazy.  There seems to be a growing chasm between us, because my behavior is based on love and optimism instead of distrust and immediately expecting the worst.

What can I do?  Well, other than assuring them that I'm not going to run off and join a gaggle of hippies or a cult, I'm not sure.  What if everyone let their fear of being or thinking differently overcome them?  How many inventions would never have come to fruition if people were afraid to think outside the box?  What if Columbus, Einstein, the Wright Brothers and the like had just followed the status quo? Following popular opinion might be easier, but it's not always appropriate.  With any movement, there have to be a few people at the beginning willing to stand up and take a chance.  To look different, or irrational, until the new way of thinking becomes normal.

I know it's hard not to be ruled by fear, and it didn't happen for me overnight.  In fact, I still struggle with it sometimes.  One of the best things I ever did was to stop watching the evening news.  I would be so depressed after the first five minutes I couldn't stand it.  The news channels love to perpetuate fear, with the "If it bleeds it leads" mantra.  People will say to me, "Well, you have to stay informed".  I can assure you I do.  I might not be the first person to spread the word about an earthquake in Haiti, but I find out about it shortly after everyone else.

I'd like to leave you with a quote from Einstein.  As I was searching for quotes, I realized that there is a reason he was a genius.  It was a tough decision, but this one seemed the most appropriate for today.

"The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant.
We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift."

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